Dear Y.E.S.S.,

I just can=t seem to get along with my brother. We always argue and fight, even over very small things! I know he is my brother and I do love him! What can I do to stop this fighting. Please help!

Dear Desperate Sister,

You often argue and fight with your brother, because you can see his faults very well. However, you do not reflect on yourself. You cannot see yourself, because of your self-attachments. Your self-centerdness become hindrance to see the truth.

Our teaching is to realize our evilness which is our ineradicable blind passions and to become a humble person. It is important for you to realize your ignorance in your daily life through the guidance of the Buddha and the teaching. Even though you cannot be perfectly humble, however, you need to practice the humility in your daily life.

Please memorize the following words of Rennyo Shonin and before fighting and argument with your brother, please remember them. AThe faults of others are easily seen. The faults of one=s own one does not realize. If we realize anything wrong with us, this means it is so much wrong that it becomes known to us. We should take things this way and mend our minds. Only trust wells in what others say. We are prone to overlook our own faults.@